Thursday, June 4, 2009

Controlling A Powerful Emotion -- Jealousy

For years I thought I have mastered how to control this exhausting emotion, its a combination of anger, hatred, insecurity, fear, anxiety, and selfishness. You are your own enemy, you make yourself sink in a hideous quicksand that in one moment you forgot how to get up, sometimes you make a move, you scream, you act like a child and make your partner feel bad, and the next thing you know you are even drowning yourself in a tricky illusion of a quicksand, That's why it is made, to drown you to made you feel even worst.

But what if you decide not to move, will it make any difference? If you don't move you have a better chance to survive, because no emotions can be seen in you, all people tough is that you are fine, that maybe you just slip in the sand, not knowing you are already drowning slowly. Sometimes when you cant contain it anymore you'll just begin to squall out especially when evidence is in your face, that's the secret of this emotion it will make you think you have a better chance to live when you shut up, then it'll make you scream till it watch you dead.

Some people decides to jump on it on purpose, those people who can't handle their emotions stops their agony in the beginning, sounds like a clever idea... a coward but a clever idea.

Only few can survive this quicksand in their lives, those who mastered how to be hurt, those people who are use to feel this kind of unyielding emotion. When crisis like this happen in their lives they manage this like an old game, where they have mastered the answers and tricks to all obstacles of it. In "acute stress response" of "fight or flight response" they always choose the flight, how? I dont know... its like an instinct to them to choose this rather than fight. Maybe they'll know it's not worthy to fight an unwinnable situation. So its flight! I admire this desicion, its hard to let it just fly, the temptation to shout will always be there, pulling you and commanding you to use your lungs and shout it out. It's not being coward, its a though choice but the right one.

When you choose to fight jealousy its like a one way ticket to loosing the game. Stay calm, be reasonable, stop being insecure for your security lies in yourself.

It's hard I know, but I want to be belonged in those few people who mastered how to cntroll this powerful emotion -- Jealousy.

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